It's 1:15 am, and I've spent the last hour sleepless, staring at the wall in our dark bedroom, Jason soundly asleep beside me.
As I lay there, I feel the kicks and squirms of the baby inside of me, and it dawns on me afresh: there is life inside of me. A child with ten tiny fingers and toes, with a personality, spirit, and future of her own is being knit together even as I lay in my bed. She is being knit together in my womb by the very Creator of the universe....maker of Heaven and earth! This very child inside of me is so cared for and loved that every hair on her head is counted and loved by God himself! Her talents and skills, He is weaving into her very being right now......because she is His design.....His workmanship. She is being created on purpose, for a purpose. How am I so blessed to have been chosen as a vessel for the creation of life?! Four times, I have had the honor and privilege to be part of the creation process. Three precious souls I have come to know, love and cherish because of this.
As I lay there pondering all of this, the verse clearly came to me: "Do you not know that you are a temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwells in you?" (1 Corinthians 3:16)
I find it interesting how God uses our lives to teach us the things we need to know. However, there it is...plainly laid out before me: We ALL have life inside of us. That concept has always seemed rather illusive to me, but as I lay in the dark pondering my fourth pregnancy, it seems as clear as day. The baby inside of me is far more than just a physical life......just as my other children Caleb, Emet, and Anna Ruth are unique...each their own. Just as I am unique and you are. We are spiritual beings, and the Spirit of God dwells within us. I have had the benefit of God teaching me this lesson through a physical process, but each of us is no less full of life than I.
This child inside of me knows nothing but instinctively to allow the Creator to mold and shape her, trusting without thought.....and so too are we to be in Christ. The process does not end at birth! We are not to be carried away by the worries of this world but are to live His purpose knowing we were created on purpose, for a purpose.
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. 3 You scrutinize my path and my lying down, And are intimately acquainted with all my ways. 4 Even before there is a word on my tongue, Behold, O LORD, You know it all. 5 You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is too high, I cannot attain to it. 7 Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? 8 If I ascend to heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in Sheol, behold, You are there. 9 If I take the wings of the dawn, If I dwell in the remotest part of the sea, 10 Even there Your hand will lead me, And Your right hand will lay hold of me. 11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will overwhelm me, And the light around me will be night,” 12 Even the darkness is not dark to You, And the night is as bright as the day. Darkness and light are alike to You. 13 For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb. 14 I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; 16 Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them. 17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with You. 19 O that You would slay the wicked, O God; Depart from me, therefore, men of bloodshed. 20 For they speak against You wickedly, And Your enemies take Your name in vain. 21 Do I not hate those who hate You, O LORD? And do I not loathe those who rise up against You? 22 I hate them with the utmost hatred; They have become my enemies. 23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; 24 And see if there be any hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way.
Psalm 139
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